Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
