Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
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