lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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