The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
