I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
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