Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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