Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
ok first of all what the fuck
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize