ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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