And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
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The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
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Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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