i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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