the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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