Im at strip club and am horny
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize