What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
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