good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
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