I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
