i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
