her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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