what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
This baby is an asshole
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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