I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
