Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize