Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
