i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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