I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Naked. naked and bneed help.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
