dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
