Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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