You're my little dorito
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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