Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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