It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
