omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize