she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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