I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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