Define "chronic" masturbator.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
it's great music for shaving your balls
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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