i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
