i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
