question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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