butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Randomize