addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
