My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize