....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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