Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
