Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize
