ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
You work out of a Hotel?
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
