I don't usually arrange sex via text message
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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