I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
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i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
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he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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