Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize