You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize
