I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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