Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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