I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
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We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
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she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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