he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
